Monday, 27 February 2012

Snow falls and softly blankets my life...

Snow falls and softly blankets my life...

As snow falls again tonight, it is the first time since the week before my daughter was born that I am in London with thick snow on the ground. I look at the snow tonight with my almost 3 year old daughter and watch the magic she feels by seeing this amazing white icing type snow falling from the sky.

It looks like sparklies on the floor mommy ... Please open the door and the windows mom - let it come in side - so innocent and so sweet! As she stands by the window looking up at the snow dancing around the light like little tiny dandelions - she blinks and says - Mommy the snow is getting in my eyes (windows and doors closed and we are inside ). How magical snow must seem to little ones. Snow balls and snow men, sparkly and twinkly white magic...


Michaela Week 1 - Her first little Yawn (not scream)
I now think back to the last time I saw snow like this - it was the week before my life changed for good. This first time in over 50 years that london came to a stand still. February 2009 - it snowed so hard people in london abandoned their cars and walked home. London was shut down for the day and chaos ensuided with the traffic, trains and busses for the rest of the week. All in the while my belly was getting riper for the birth of my Michaela... I remember being nervous that even if we made it to the hospital there would be no one their to help us deliver our first little bundle of joy... But my little monkey decided to stay in a week longer than expected, how considerate of her...

http://www.sutton-court.co.uk/events/SnowShots2009.html

Chiswick Feb 2009
I remember sitting at home waiting for the contractions to get closer , I remember shopping at Sainsburies while in labour and buying the whole shop in case we needed it and not using a single thing we bought except 1 bottle of water. I remember having birthing sound track and loads of idea's and plans - I remember having a birthing plan ( what a load of bolocks ) . I remember having all these preconceived ideas about children how my child would be and what they would be and how we would raise our child.

I remember wanting to use cloth nappies ( blah blah - all good intentions) I remember reading all these baby books and saying the baby will fit into our lives and not us into the babies life ( oh how the mighty have fallen !! ). I remember thinking my child will be like this and I will be like that and this is how it we will do things - all by the book. I remember thinking we have this all so well prepared planned out !!! I've done my home work - bring it on !!! Until the day my beautiful little girl (who I thought was going to be a boy ) was born. I expected a blonde haired chubby little boy and instead we received a wonderful petite little black haired , doll like baby girl. hhhhmmmm???? And now ??? All the books and plans just went out the window!!!
Michaela's first photo - few seconds old...





Michaela was born with the cord around her neck 5 times ( I remember hearing the midwife unravel her cord really fast before she passed her to me) and weighed all of 3kg ( nice weight for a girl).

That was the day everything changed in my life - I went from having to only think of myself - to being souly committed to caring for someone else no matter what the cost... She changed my whole world - she didn't fit into our lives - we had to fit into hers, we never used cloth nappies, and the book went out the window on week 2.







Very happy tired mom - Michaela a few hours hold - still in hospital 
I remember realising she was not going to be the personality or child I wanted her to be but she was going to be the wonderful personality that she was born to be ... Little Miss independent and deciceful from the first week. I remember the midwife placing her in the cot next to my bed after I had her and thinking " Oh my baby is so far away - and how abnormal it must be for to be away from me ..." 
Daddy and his little girl .... Michaela's first encounter with Dad! Love at first sight these two!!
She was only minutes old...

So much for them being in her own bed (as the good books said) - I promptly took her out of the cot and put her in my bed and thats where she stayed for the next 9 months... It was that moment from taking her out that poky cot to putting her into my bed next to me that I decided and realised i would give my life for this little creature and we would fit our whole world around this little being and not her around us ...

Its true what they say - you really cant prepare yourself for child , you just have to experience them and what an experience parent hood is !!! 

So now when I look at snow I always think how my children have fallen into my life and have changed it and covered it with so much beautiful joy & pain - but my love for snow and the magical feeling it evokes in me - doesn't come near the love and excitement I feel towards my children. Just like snow they are beautiful but they have their painful slippery spots but ultimately they are a work of God and my little miracles ... You see I was told I wouldn't have children by my doctors so they truly are my little magical miracles !


Our snow man 

Our little Michaela - so big now - not so little any more...

Michaela very happy with her snow man - she checked on him every day till he went "home".
To live with the polar bear and penguins apparently? 


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4 comments:

elderflowertea said...

Hi dear. Im here to comment. Cute children!!

JC said...

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Tanja Kent said...

Thanks for the feedback ! much appreciated

Sue said...

Gorgeous post! Made me smile cause I thought exactly the same way you did before my daughter arrived in June 2009 and everything changed (for the better!)

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